Some of my work... Feed appreciated.. thanks

[misTarLL]

Alright, this is some of my work from previous battles.. tell me where I can get better, and if you could improve my lines, go ahead and SHOW ME how you DID it.. thanks... much love

Punches be "BLOWING" harder then a 'FAN' on 'HIGH'
Cuz it won't take much strength to get this fag to 'DIE'

Only time this kid get pleasure N he "Cracks A Smile"
Is when he harassing little kids, fucking "Pedophile"

Son, I'm like a designer, I'll design your face
Finished product will be your av, what a disgrace


**dudes av was a smiley... and it said 'Crack A Smile'
----

Magic? Please, your lyrics fail like they're "David Blaine tricks"
Only time you land on the "mark" is when your heading for the 'dicks'

Trying to act all street, when you can't even back up a call-out
Bosco would tear you up, so you backed up and fall-out

Staying on Lil Wayne's dick, like you can lose some more "respect"
Your similar with wrong, all your punches will just come "incorrect"

Only time you going down is when you giving some head
"Oh he's a gay motherfucker," I'm just quoting what your mama "said"

**kids name was MagicMark...

[GrIme E]

Originally Posted by misTarLL

Alright, this is some of my work from previous battles.. tell me where I can get better, and if you could improve my lines, go ahead and SHOW ME how you DID it.. thanks... much love

Punches be "BLOWING" harder then a 'FAN' on 'HIGH'
Cuz it won't take much strength to get this fag to 'DIE'

Only time this kid get pleasure N he "Cracks A Smile"
Is when he harassing little kids, fucking "Pedophile"

Son, I'm like a designer, I'll design your face
Finished product will be your av, what a disgrace


**dudes av was a smiley... and it said 'Crack A Smile'
----

Magic? Please, your lyrics fail like they're "David Blaine tricks"
Only time you land on the "mark" is when your heading for the 'dicks'

Trying to act all street, when you can't even back up a call-out
Bosco would tear you up, so you backed up and fall-out

Staying on Lil Wayne's dick, like you can lose some more "respect"
Your similar with wrong, all your punches will just come "incorrect"

Only time you going down is when you giving some head
"Oh he's a gay motherfucker," I'm just quoting what your mama "said"

**kids name was MagicMark...

ok so your working on punches huh...

try to be more straight forward, you have the idea but your trying to hard..

umm check it

These are just random shit of the top off my head

hurricane wrath, that leaves heads spinin like back tires on bikes
So take that, cuz your backwards like tigers on stripes