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07-27-2011, 09:11 PM
| #1 |
| Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Fort Myers, FL
Posts: 313
|  No sunshine
Aint no sunshine when shes gone Its not warm when shes away aint no sunshine when shes gone She's always gone too long anytime she goes away Yeah it's hot out here florida in the summertime Thinking bout my problems drunk off cheap wine My thoughts are getting dark I need some sunshine But, there aint no sunshine when it rains And here in florida It's raining everyday So i ask God Please take the rain away And while your at it Take the pain too Times are gettin rough I'm just trying to make it through So please come back baby I miss you You packed you bags Walked out the door When it closed shut I hit the floor Yeah we got problems I'm always coming home late But that ain't a reason For us to seperate Someones gotta work We got rent to pay It aint my fault That it takes all day You think i want to work In this hot sun I'd rather be at home Playing with our son I'm sorry for the fights But it's not a crime Please come back baby Your my sunshine Aint no sunshine when shes gone Its not warm when shes away aint no sunshine when shes gone She's always gone too long anytime she goes away Yeah, now your gone Off to a far place I gotta say baby I'm gonna miss your face I'm gonna miss your smile I'm gonna miss your tears The fun that we had When we were drinking beers What about our son What about our life You cut me deep baby Might as well of used a knife But instead you walked out And left me here Left me all alone Left me with fear Fear that you might, Never, Never come back I feel like a train, Derailed, Derailed from it's track So please come back baby At least one more time The darkness is creeping in I need my sunshine Aint no sunshine when shes gone Its not warm when shes away aint no sunshine when shes gone She's always gone too long anytime she goes away Yeah, i keep wondering If your coming back Did you leave because Of the funds that i lack I'm sorry baby I can't do this shit no more I can't keep watching you Walk out the door You got my mind running in circles Like it's on a track I can't take this shit no more Call me Eamon, Cuz I don't want you back And i'll call you Anderson Silva Cuz you got me beat like Forrest I'm down for the count baby Now it's your turn to sing the chorus I got her singing Aint no sunshine when hes gone Its not warm when hes away aint no sunshine when hes gone He's always gone too long anytime he goes away Last edited by Flick; 07-28-2011 at 03:10 PM. |
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07-27-2011, 09:13 PM
| #2 |
| Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Fort Myers, FL
Posts: 313
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My first attempt ever at a song, had a beat playing while i wrote hope someones likes this spent the past hour and a half writting it
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07-28-2011, 03:12 PM
| #3 |
| Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Fort Myers, FL
Posts: 313
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HA I went back and read this and thought I gotta stand up to that chick walking out on me so i revised it
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07-29-2011, 03:03 PM
| #4 |
| formerly known as DA BIGGEST  Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Igloo Projects
Posts: 9,490
| This was an ok piece, is it based off true events or just somethin you jotted down randomly? KOS
__________________ Real Eyes Realize Real Lies |
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07-29-2011, 05:01 PM
| #5 |
| Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Fort Myers, FL
Posts: 313
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Some facts here and there just tried to write it like i was going through it. I started writing poems about two weeks ago, but Hip-Hop was a big part of why i started, so I downloaded a free beat that came with the hook (ain't no sunshine) sat down with my mp3 blasting signed up here to get some opinions (i felt like i could flow but needed to be judged) and started writing trying to keep it in story form was the hardest part. appreciate the feed back
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